Fighter mentality

"So what do you like to do for fun?"
"I do Krav Maga"
"What's that?"
"Israeli Combat fighting.  I also do one day of Jiu Jitsu every week."  *initiate look of terror, confusion, attraction or weirded out.* 

This is what happens to me every time I tell someone I do Krav Maga.  I know I've mentioned it before but for those who don't know, Krav is Israeli Hand Combat.  Brought over from Israel, it is a fast and furious martial art... and a killer workout.  Jiu Jitsu is ground fighting that involves a lot of chokes and holds to either break or tear ligaments or bones, or cut off blood flow to the brain and make someone pass out. 

I decided to do it because I'm not working so I have way too much time on my hands.  I want to get in shape quickly.  I am going to go on a mission, so I need to learn how to defend myself.  In case I were to get in a situation where I needed to defend myself and/or my companion, especially if my companion was somehow limited in defending herself, then I could do it and probably not get injured in the process.  Even if I was knocked down I could find ways to get up. 

 I love Krav because the coaches are fantastic.  They teach you the moves, tell you what you did wrong, but they never make you feel like crap.  I feel like I can do anything while I'm with these instructors.  Sometimes I want to give them a face full of knuckles after making us do another round of push ups because someone didn't do the drill all the way.  Sometimes I want to break down because they're screaming at me to keep going and never give up even when my knee is about to give out.  But I have great respect for my teachers. 

As a girl, it boosts my confidence dramatically.  I feel fit, strong, capable, and that much more prepared for any situation.  I'm losing weight and getting stronger arms, legs and abs.  Even though I'm only a level one, and I probably won't test for level two for another month, I have a solid foundation of defenses to draw from.  I go dancing with my friends in a city.  I feel much more safe walking back to the car with my friends at 2 am. 
 
 So why am I engaging in such brutal and physically demanding sports that could permanently disable someone if executed hard enough?  It's not just for the mission.  It's because I am learning to push through something hard, without the option of giving up or quitting.  Now I have had my trials in my life.  Some of them I did give up on and they eventually floated away with time.  Others I gave up on temporarily until I felt I was strong enough to face them.  Sometimes I was able to wait until I was ready to face them and other times they would just knock me down harder than I ever imagined.  And there are some that I have fought until the very end.  I know that In the mission field, (unless it is absolutely necessary), there is no such thing as quitting.  There's no such thing as giving up because it's hard.  I know I will have many experiences where I just want to break down and cry because I'm emotionally drained and physically exhausted.  But I will have to keep going.  In a fight, it's the same concept.  The foe is not going to back off to let you take a break.  They'll throw the hits, kicks, and weapons until you beat them, or they tire out. 

I'm at a point in my life where I will be bearing responsibilities and trials that, if gave up on them, would produce deadly consequences.  You may be thinking, "wow this chick is a wimp if she's using a fighting class to learn how to be tough."  I'm not going to debate what determines a strong person.  Even though my trials may seem smaller to others, they were big to me.  They were what I needed.  Right now, this class is what I need.   I pay for it myself so I know that if I don't go, that's another massive amount of money down the tubes for no reason (and that's a big deal because this class costs more than a hundred a month.)  While I'm there, there are so many moments where I want to just break down and cry.  Either because it hurts, I'm sore, I'm tired or the next choke defense drill is absolutely terrifying.  But I signed up for it.  So I force it back and keep going.  All of it is physical training but it's also mental training.  It's training to keep going, don't stop, put in the extra mile because that is what makes the difference.  One of the greatest lessons I've learned is that the mind gives up before the body. This class isn't just giving me toned arms.  It is helping me develop the mental will power to keep fighting and keep going... even when it's tough.